simul justus et peccator.

Tonight was AWESOME.
My friend and I got the privilege to sit and listen to Steve Wilburn talk about proclaiming the good news, and it was really just.. dang. This friend, Ashley, she’s someone who I’ve gone to church with before, but I never really knew if she loved God truly, wholly or where she stood with Jesus. After the service, though, God really showed me her heart. We hung out at the church’s cafe and just got into it. We talked about evolution, and homosexuality, and wanderers, and just how difficult it can be to preach. That was the first time I had ever actually sat down with someone who struggles with the same things I do and who’s curious about the same things I am. And as if that wasn’t enough, our friend David comes up out of nowhere and just starts talking about the first few chapters of Genesis, and all of this theology talk is just swirling around and it was the best thing to be caught up in. And God showed me tonight that this is what I should be living. He meant for me to be hanging out with people who want to explore Christ, and who want to preach, and who want to study theology. It felt so indescribably incredible.

..ah, guys. God. Is. Great.

So… I know I haven’t been posting lately, but I’m in a bad place right now. And I know I say that a lot it might seem, but this time is for real. I don’t want to get into specifics because I feel like… that just wouldn’t be good for me right now, but I wanted to let you all know, I’m not going to be on often anymore. I need serious time to get my head straight. This is the worst I have ever been in my relationship with God, and Tumblr just isn’t helping me fix that. I feel like it’s just made it worse.

So. If any of you all would care to talk about anything with me, I’m always here for you. You can email me at chloejew@gmail.com. Or you can add me on Facebook, which is hyperlinked on my page.

Your prayers would be so appreciated during this really nasty time. I’m genuinely falling apart and I sincerely don’t think I’m capable of fixing myself all alone. Just one little, ‘Lord, guide Chloe’ would be amazing. Anything would.

Thanks guys.

haha ina. :) you’re the most beautiful thing this earth ever saw. i love you child.

Ask me anything

And I don’t think there’s anything more fascinating. There are so many questions that arise when I think about evolution. Like, maybe there’s different ways to interpret what the Bible means during Genesis. Maybe it’s not literal. And that was something my biology teacher brought up. There were a lot of things my biology teacher brought up that just make me think. Not doubt, but think.

The Bible is full of parables and a lot of things aren’t meant to be taken literally. Could it be that Genesis isn’t literal? I mean, could Adam and Eve be a metaphorical representation of the first forms of life? What if they weren’t fully human? It says that He created man and woman in His own image… but really, no one knows what that is. Just because the Bible says Adam and Even were man and woman, that doesn’t mean they looked like what man and woman look like today. That’s what evolution is about. The world changes, and people change with it. My teacher said something really interesting, which is that God created a world that is forever changing. If He created humans, wouldn’t He make sure that we would be able to change with it? If He wouldn’t have, we wouldn’t be able to survive.

Something my friend in another class brought up was that maybe Adam and Eve were small, living cells that lead to human existence. They were the first building blocks. And from that I thought about how Eve came from Adam’s rib cage. Maybe that means cell division. One cell is copied from another, and from that another, and from that another, and so on.

And there are so many translations of the Bible. There is no way to know which one is the closest to the original Hebrew text. God is just far too complex for any single human to ever understand completely, so we cannot rely solely on man’s translation of the Bible.

I don’t know. My brain’s just buzzing around inside my head right now. Above all, I know God created us. He created the world. He created everything. I know that, and no scientific evidence will dismiss that truth in my heart. It’s solid truth and I will stand by that forever. But what I don’t know is literally how. And that’s what I’d like to know.

So yeah… I’d love to hear ya’ll’s thoughts on this. I think it’s the best discussion anyone can ever have.

Lord, I want you to take my entire self and consume it with Your goodness and Your goodness alone. I am a messy and distracted sinner, tricked by the deceitful sparkle of this world. Hold my hand, please, and guide me towards Your one and only salvation. I just keep falling over and over again. I trust in Your love and compassion. I want it to fill me up. I want You.

The question at hand here is, WHY ARE YOU SO AWESOME? Huh punk?!
:) and I actually do not know who this is. Ha. 10 bajillion bucks isn’t that much anyway, though.

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Luuuukkkkeeeeee, little Luke, Luke the little one, Luke Littleton… I’m great! :) just working on the French Revolution scrapbook thing. It’s a drag.

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Ask me somethin’! :) http://formspring.me/chloelin

Dude. Do it. :) People will be so into it. I know I would. Haha.

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Hahaha. I only have 3 patches. :) haha. You should go buy a vest or something and sew them on! FASHION STATEMENT.

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Well you smell like a wet seal that just dived through a dumpster! And you’re the worst person I’ve ever met. Whoever you are, I hate you. ;) happy opposite day!

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Awe gurrrl :) YOU are awesome! I’m happy I met you this year. :)
<3 I love you toooo!

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:) heck, why didn’t you ask sooner?! Let’s get married now!

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is like the coolest thing on this planet. Just… seriously. SO cool.

Hey lil love. :) I’m doing great! How are you?
Awe. We were cute boogers weren’t we? I still have some patches from Girl Scouts. I don’t know what I’m gonna do with them, but whatever. They’re nice to have. :) ha.
Love youuu! <3

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… is the worst thing on this planet. Really, I don’t think there’s anything worse that someone can feel besides feeling like you’ve been abandoned, and that no one cares, and that you’re the only person in this world who feels a certain way. It’s horrible to feel like the only one. And I mean the absolute horrible. I can handle arguments, or people judging the way I live, or feeling like I failed in reaching a goal. But I cannot handle feeling alone. It’s a killer. In both the metaphorical and literal sense.

But see, that’s why I love Jesus. I mean, I can be down in the dumps, feeling like I’m unimportant, or like no one really cares about me and my life and the things I think are important. But then my heart will always find a way to remind myself, “Hey, remember… Jesus is here, and He cares. Always.”

This is just a random thought. But a good one, at that.